Two Thieves of Clarity

Have you ever caught yourself saying, “I don't know,” when what you really meant was, “I wish I knew exactly how this will turn out”?

I’ve been there. We all have.

We crave clarity because it feels like confidence—but the truth is, most of us are confusing clarity with certainty.

The Far Enemy: Confusion (a.k.a. the mental fog)

Donald Miller says, “Refuse to be confused.”

It sounds simple, but most of us swim in confusion without even realizing it. The swirling thoughts, the pros-and-cons lists, the “maybe this / maybe that” self-talk—it’s all noise. And noise is a choice.

Confusion is the far enemy of clarity because it keeps us circling the runway instead of taking off.
It disguises itself as preparation—more research, more conversations, more journaling—when really it’s just fear in a prettier outfit.

When clients say, “I don’t know what to do next,” we usually find they do know the next step—they’re just afraid it might not be perfect.

Refusing to be confused means you decide to stop swirling. You pick one next right thing and do it, trusting that movement itself will clear the fog.

The Near Enemy: Rigid Certainty (the counterfeit clarity)

If confusion keeps us paralyzed, rigid certainty keeps us boxed in.
It’s the moment we say, “I already know how this goes,” and shut down curiosity.

Rigid certainty is tricky because it looks like clarity. You feel decisive, disciplined, on-top-of-it. But underneath, it’s often anxiety in control’s clothing.

In Positive Intelligence language, this is where the Stickler or Controller saboteur shows up. We overuse our need for clarity until it becomes a cage. We trade growth for predictability.

True clarity has humility baked in—it’s directional, not absolute. It says, “Here’s what I know right now, and I’m open to learning what I don’t.”

How to Find the Middle Ground

If confusion is chaos and certainty is control, clarity is curiosity with a compass.
It’s a quiet confidence that says, “I can move, even without guarantees.”

Try this reflection this week:

👉 Am I seeking true clarity—or clinging to certainty because it feels safer?

Then, when you feel the swirl of indecision, say Donald Miller’s line out loud: “I refuse to be confused.”
Take one small, imperfect step forward. That step will create the next bit of clarity you need.

Because clarity isn’t something you wait for—it’s something you walk into.

💡 Want to know which “C” you most need to strengthen—Clarity, Confidence, or Consistency? Take the Momentum Quiz