What's Blocking Your Growth

Have you ever tried so hard to live out a value—like generosity, courage, or consistency—only to realize later that you ended up exhausted, resentful, or off course?

Here’s why: every value has two enemies.

One is easy to spot. The other is sneaky.

Brené Brown, in her newest work, highlights a concept borrowed from Buddhist wisdom. Every value has a “far enemy” and a “near enemy.”

• The far enemy is obvious. For example, the far enemy of generosity is selfishness. Easy to call out.

• The near enemy is trickier. It looks like the value, but it’s actually a counterfeit. For generosity, the near enemy is self-sacrifice—giving so much of yourself that you lose boundaries, joy, or balance.

That landed for me. Because it’s exactly what we talk about in Positive Intelligence: how the very strengths that help us succeed can get overused until they sabotage us.

Think about it:

• Clarity can be derailed by confusion (far enemy) or by rigid certainty (near enemy).

• Confidence can be undermined by insecurity (far enemy) or arrogance (near enemy).

• Consistency can be blocked by procrastination (far enemy) or perfectionism (near enemy).

This month, we’ll explore each of these in turn. But for now, here’s a practical tool:

👉 Reflection Tool: This week, when you notice yourself struggling, ask:

• Am I up against the opposite of my value (the far enemy)?

• Or am I slipping into the counterfeit version (the near enemy)?

The more we name these, the quicker we can get back to the real thing.

Because true clarity, confidence, and consistency don’t drain you. They free you.

💡 Want to know which one you most need right now? Take the Momentum Quiz to find out.